A&A; Coping Alone and A New Sense of Freedom

This week was a fantastic week, for both of us and had plenty of those ‘epiphany’ moments along the way.
It was the first week since June last year that we spent longer than a day apart from each other, so it was quite strange, but also sort of nice…

The awkward this week I’m blaming entirely on the fact I was left to fend for myself for a whole 4 days (*mock horror*).
I was in Blackpool this week for an intensive driving course, a last ditch attempt to get my license before we move back and I’m stuck as passenger and then on Ps until my 30s…
I just wanted to get away from roads I knew, no distractions. Chill out and just focus on passing.

As it turns out, despite being a seasoned LDR veteran (that’s long distance relationship to the un-inducted) I’m totally over the whole ‘not seeing the person you love for 6 weeks then getting one weekend together’ thing.
And as sad (sweet) as it may be, the whole 4 days without Zac were…well they were a lot quieter, but they felt so long.
There were all these gaps in the day and then dinner time solo was so lonely!

Don’t get me wrong, I love having my own space, going for walks by myself, finding a new coffee hole, people watching and going off the grid for a few hours, but I’m a social creature, despite sometimes crippling social anxiety (a cruel irony) I do love people, being surrounded by noise and chatter and…well Zac.

Leave me to my own devices and by the second afternoon of driving week I was ready to take a walk along the Blackpool promenade, solo.
Lunch ideas were leaving me uninspired and I knew I had houmous and pitta at the accommodation to snack on in the arvo, after walking past my third waft of donuts I caved and got 3 cinnamon sugar donuts and a coffee.

I was enjoying my stroll along the prom and thought I’d stop to take stock with a view of the sea, and listen to the sound of the waves crashing in.
Now I know how crafty seagulls are and seeing them attacking a hoard of tourists with chips on some benches further down I picked an unassuming bench away from the squawking and sat down to enjoy my treats.
Two bites in to my first donut and some opportunistic feathered felon swoops down and swipes my ‘nut.

There’s been one other occasion of fly by theft in my life with a pasty in Cornwall, but I thought I’d learned from my mistakes and outsmarted them.
It was however, incredibly amusing.
I sat a few minutes longer as more ‘gulls started to gather, intrigued by the sweet prize their friend had scavenged and before they had chance to help themselves to my coffee, I admitted defeat and headed back to base.

Quite simply: I passed my driving test.
Let me write that again.

I passed my driving test.

It’s only 6 years overdue, but I’ve finally bloody done it!
While on the whole I think driving crash courses are not ideal (and indeed saw first hand that they don’t suit everyone) for me, it was perfect.
I was away from distraction and self created pressure, I was in my own little bubble of serenity and calm and endlessly repeating a mantra telling myself I could do it, I was a good driver, I will pass my test.

Friday morning came and I was ready.
Slightly nervous, but nowhere near the level of nerve and fear I had my first test: this time it felt right.
Zac had come up the night before (on my request) and I’d actually managed to sleep.
45 minutes later, despite getting my worst manoeuvre and some impatient old man tooting me, the examiner was telling me I’d passed (with 6 minors, which I was happy about).

Huge thanks also have to go to Kim, who ran the driving school/house that I did the course through and Jim my instructor who I couldn’t have done it without.
I’ll forever have his Manc voice in my head as I approach a roundabout saying:
Information, information, information, get the work done, see what’s happening and let’s go…”

I was, naturally, a little skeptical and didn’t know what to expect, but if you’ve already got some experience and just want to ‘get it done’, then give these guys a call.
You’ll get a lot of guidance and support, the instructors are great and you really are in a ‘home from home’ – everyone in the BnB is in the same boat, you’re all there to try and pass your test, so you can just get your head down and work hard

Zac immediately asked Dad to get me insured on Bertie and that afternoon I drove us back from Leicester.
Terrifying and also so. much. fun.

finally feel like a real adult.
Not that I needed any more sense of independence…


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