This week’s awkward and awesome include two of my favourite things: writing and seeing friends.
As you’ll know if you’re a regular reader of Take Your Marks Go, I recently started working in the call centre in Ashby.
The call centre is renowned for breeding a very negative work force and I’d been trying my best to avoid working there because, quite frankly, I knew I’d hate it.
Job dissatisfaction hasn’t been helping with everything else, but I’ve been given funding by the good ol’ British Government to do an online Customer Service course, rewarding me with the high accolade of a Level 2 in Customer Service upon completion.
Not exactly Cambridge, but my mind is enjoying the daily stimulation and approaching work from an analytic and theoretical sense is, at least, making the days go marginally quicker.
Nothing too awkward so far, right?
Well I was halfway through writing what I was hoping to be a killer answer for section 2 of Unit 1 when it suddenly struck me:
“Oh shit. I’m a feminist. When the fuck did that happen?”
If you’ve known me for long enough, you’ll know I’ve always been famously ‘anti-feminist’, not that I’ve not been against women’s rights, I think I’ve just been against the idea that because I’m an ‘intelligent young woman’ I was expected to be a feminist and I distinctly remember one teacher at school (a feminist) telling me I was ‘wasting my brain’ wanting to be a mother and that it was a ‘shame I didn’t want to do something’ with my life.
I’m also incredibly stubborn so from that point on, feminism wasn’t something I was interested in.
Turns out, all this time I’ve been a closet feminist and never knew!
Probably not a surprise for any of you, but I was certainly surprised and felt I didn’t get the reaction I’d expected when I ‘came out’ to Zac, whose response was something along the lines of: “Well, of course you are babe!”
My problem, it would seem, has always been with societal conceptions of femininity and not feminism itself.
For example, I think it’s entirely unfair that female CEOs on average earn around 35% less than their male counterparts, doing the same jobs, under the same pressures and I especially think it’s vile and unjust that women are passed over for promotion or jobs because they ‘might have kids’ (I’ve been burned by that myself in the past).
What should it matter to someone what I decide to do with my uterus in the future if I’m the best person for the job on the day?
I hate that seemingly women have to choose between being in the ‘masculine’ domain of business, or the ‘feminine’ domain of motherhood, yet the ultimate business women and original Domestic Goddess, Nigella Lawson has managed to do just that and blindside everyone in the process. She’s made a business out of exploited all those things we think of as ‘feminine’ and…I could go on all day. In fact, that was the topic of my dissertation, but I always thought I was looking upon feminism with scorn, when in fact my problem is with gender inequality, still obnoxiously prevalent in contemporary Western society.
End rant, step down off high horse, breathe, bake cupcake.
My awesome this week came from a ‘semi’ impromptu visit to Bradford to see one of my dearest friends George before she’s jetting off for a few months around South East Asia (something I’m only slightly jealous she’s beaten me to!)
I’d been unable to make it for drinks the evening before, so I turned up to find George slightly hungover and a little delicate. One GIANT pub lunch later and we were off to the panto that evening.
Perfect spontaneous activities to cure any pre-travelling jitters.
I consider myself very lucky that I’m surrounded by friends that I can just pick up where I left off with, no matter how long has passed.
I’m trying desperately not to book a flight to join her though… The weekend away was the perfect remedy I needed, I slept better than I have in weeks, woke up feeling truly refreshed. We went for a little stroll, whizzed up a treat in the Nutribullet (side note: I NEED one) and then had some home-made eggs Benedict.
Even though it was only one night, the time in a different surrounding, away from ‘it all’ meant that I came home, ready for the week ahead.
And truth be told, it’s a week that I’m perhaps dreading, somewhat…